Friday, May 11, 2018

This is the pain that was always there

the child that never stopped crying.
the fathers that left.
the mother frozen in trauma.
the grandpa, broken from war.

the grandma locked in her castle.
the sister hiding her scars.
the child that left her body.
the girl that could’ve been a boy.

the boy that never was.
the person now trapped in a body.
the father at his desk, turned away.
the mother refusing to eat.

this is everytime the child was left.
the person now tries hard to love,
but instead pushes people away.

the grandpa who couldn’t stop hitting.
the mother that still doesn’t eat.
the woman that must die
for the person to live

the name we must lose.

what we must give up,
to be who we are.

This is the loss of you.
But this is not about you. 

This is the child, afraid.
The parents, too injured to hold the child.

So it must be the person, as the child.
To become whole, to break
To stay there
To listen. 

The child and the person
Both at once
The part and the whole
The wave and the sea
The moment gone
The moment to come.

The person holds the child.
The child screams.
The person says it’s ok it’s ok

I'm here.
I'm here
I'm finally here.

I’m sorry I left for so long.

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